McNabb trade rumors
We all read the Don McKee article in Sunday’s Inquirer - A McNabb trade (In theory) - and it looks like the national media have all gotten around to reading it as well. You didn’t read the article?
McKee commented on a theory that the Eagles would consider trading Donovan McNabb to Chicago for disgruntled outside linebacker Lance Briggs. As Jay-Z would say, if you don’t know, now you know……
Too bad there isn’t any concrete journalism being practiced by anyone involved (local or national) so I figure hey, I won’t practice any either. Which is because, if you hadn’t noticed, this blogging gig isn’t a fulltime endeavor for me. Wish it was, but it isn’t. As Terrell Owens would say, I need to feed my family. Which looking back is puzzling because T.O. doesn’t have a wife or kids, at least none that actually live with him.
Back to the matter at hand. Donald McKee reported that the theory was given birth by the inner thought of one of the area’s most sage football observers. I thought I was the only sage football observant in town, but the list must stretch more than one name deep. Horseshit. Now I can’t kill old raggedy ass Don McKee, because, he does preface the article as a theory and later puts the idea in perspective as “just a thought.” However, the national media is running wild with the notion of a McNabb deal.
Andrew Perloff of SI.com addressed it in his blog today.
Yahoo Sports NFL has the rumor as its banner headline today.
So it seems that one identified man’s musing has made national headlines. Has anyone actually evaluated the validity of the theory? Did any reporters actual pick up the phone here? No and no.
Well I called Joe Banner this morning. What follows is the conversation as transcribed by my sexy ass executive blog assistant named Delicious.
__________
Dave: [Dials the Philadelphia Eagles. Extension 14, Joe Banner.]
Banner: Holla at me.
Dave: What’s crackin Ban Ban?
Banner: Hungover. Bought a case of Natty Light last night and near ran through the whole damn thing.
Dave: What was the occasion?
Banner: The Phillies were on HDTV. Oh, plus McNabb called me yesterday to talk about his “feelings.”
Dave: Ouch.
Banner: Yeah, I couldn’t go straight home from the office after that conversation. Two hours with McNabb, then 2 hours with my wife? One bitch a day I say.
Dave: At least the Phils won. Where’d you go? Andy’s house? I heard he was making a 13 pound leg of lamb, wrapped in bacon, with a butter reduction sauce.
Banner: Andy told me he didn’t have enough food for the both of us so I hit up the Oriental Health Spa for the tugboat special. I was thinking 3 steps ahead as usual, the beer distributor is right next to the Spa.
Dave: I though you said one bitch a day?
Banner: I lied.
Dave: So I hear you guys are going to trade McNabb to the Bears?
Banner: What? I didn’t get high this morning did I? I didn’t. That’s why I’m still hungover. Did I trade McNabb?
Dave: I don’t know, did you?
Banner: Last thing I remember is a conversation with Don McKee last night around 4am. He called me complaining that his Cinemax late night package wasn’t coming in right. Common conversation. I talked to him for only a minute…uh…….shit, my cellie says I talked to him for 53 minutes.
__________
Thanks Delicious. [love slap on the behind]
That conversation really happened.
Would the deal be feasible? Absolutely not. On how many levels would the deal not be feasible? About 69. At least that’s what Banner told me, before he started giggling.
Let’s try out a few reasons why this deal would never happen:
1. First off, Lance Briggs is under contract with the Bears. Even though his John Hancock is beautifully splayed across his original deal, Briggs wants new numbers to sign. His agent is Drew Rosenhaus. Hmm……I’ve heard this before.
2. Briggs is a weakside linebacker. The Eagles already have too many weakside guys, including new Bird Takeo Spikes. Behind Spikes the Birds are looking at 2006 5th round draft pick Omar Gaither (also working at MLB), and 2005 2nd round draft pick Matt McCoy (he sucks but he was a 2nd round pick). You think the Birds are going to trade for a guy who they’d have to pay….um, somewhere in the realm of 35 million dollars to play a position where they already have 3 recently acquired incumbents?
3. The Eagles don’t pay linebackers. See Jeremiah Trotter circa 2002.
4. In order to acquire McNabb the Bears would have to give up Briggs and at least 2 first round picks. As the GM of the Bears would you trade a franchise LB, and two 1st rounders for a 30-year old quarterback coming off a major knee injury?
5. If you were the Eagles GM would you trade your franchise quarterback, not to mention the best quarterback in the NFC, and hand the quarterbacking reigns to A.J. Feeley and/or Kevin Kolb when the NFC is basically up for grabs? Additionally, by doing this, in the short term, the Eagles would be aiding one of their top competitors in capturing the NFC crown. Could the Eagles win the NFC with a healthy McNabb? Yes. Without? Nope.
6. As the Bears GM, would you really want Donovan in the same city as his mother? Talk about a Bonnie Lindros scenario. McNabb would probably come to work everyday with his Thermos and Star Wars lunch box packed with love by Wilma McNabb.
But finally, how good is Lance Briggs without Brian Urlacher guarding his side door, along with one of the best defensive lines in football manning the front door? Briggs is a good football player playing on an exceptional defense. The reason he hasn’t been re-signed by the Bears or (as heavily rumored) acquired as draft day deal speaks volumes as to his relative worth around the league. McNabb for Briggs? Get a clue.
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Posted on May 22, 2007 by Dave | Filed Under Eagles, Philadelphia
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At least Perloff correctly cited it as a hypothesis and a theory. It’s still lame of him to further such a pointless theory, but he at least treated it correctly.
Not Yahoo. They clearly labeled it as a “rumor” in their headline. That’s just a blatant lie.